Invasions and Machine Guns

Okay, the title was WAY more intriguing than the post will be, but…

I’m going to deal with the machine guns first, since you know how I hate going in order. Yes, I start at the back of the SAT and move to the front. Actually, I don’t, but that’s not a half bad idea…

Anyways, machine guns. I’m rattling off these posts like I have no self control and have to share every stray thought with you. I need to slow down, or it’ll get boring and stuff. I had that good rate before, and then… I don’t even know. This application time is the big deal, though. I want this to be here for the next me. And maybe I’ll post my qualifications after I get rejected. Just for curious little buggers like myself. I want to let them know that they’re not alone. There was another idiot…. oh, forget it.

Invasions: I recently found a blog that actually got updated and read about a student and NCSSM. So I’m reading along and smiling to myself at the stories and squinting when I don’t like the author, noticing that she’s a lot like my ex-girlfriend who also had a blog (they’re not the same person, and I’m a guy, not a lesbian. It theoretically doesn’t matter, but it’s the sort of thing I would be curious about.) when I felt like I was SERIOUSLY invading her privacy.

If you’re applying to NCSSM, you’re not invading my privacy. You’re doing what I was hoping you would do; read. And drop me a comment if I stopped posting, or even if I still am, just to say hey.

Oh, and the other thing; I watched the Social Network recently. I need to watch what I post.

Yeah, right. I’m using a pseudonym. So they obviously will have no idea who I am. That was sarcasm, you can always figure it out.

The Promised Land

For the entire time I’ve been thinking about NCSSM, I’ve idolized it. I viewed it as the promised land. Once I go there, I’ll have a bunch of friends. I’ll have school spirit. I’ll do this, be that, get a new start, and this time, I’m going to start off strong. No one knows me, so my record has been wiped, other than that embarrassing Facebook picture and the fact that I still am terrible at staging smiles.

I’m beginning to realize that I’m wrong. I mean, I’ll get a new start, but the world is small. Plenty of people there are going  to know someone who knows me. There are going to be people I know there; there are at least 6 brilliant kids at my school applying excluding me, and there are only 100 people in my grade. And I won’t be a new person. I’ll still be me.

I can’t help but look forward to the possibility of going, but I also know that I’m expecting too much. It’s not going to be the same as where I am now, but the streets aren’t paved with gold or running with milk and honey.

More Like Me

I’ve been scavenging the web, looking for everything NCSSM, since… well, a little before October. It’s become an obsession with me, to learn everything I’d find out on my first day there. It takes longer than how long it’d take if I went to the school, but now I know the information, whether or not I’m accepted.

I always looked at the stuff and thought: “These are the people who really want it. The ones who are posting on Collegeconfidential and making blogs and submitting questions that get answered. I’m one of like 5. We should all get in, because we care more than everybody else.”

It took me until recently to make a collegeconfidential account and start posting, but now that I have, I realized something.

There aren’t just 5 of us. There are probably tens to hundreds of us. Well, hundreds may be a bit of an exaggeration, but it’s more than just the 5 whose posts I notice. There are the ones I don’t find, and there are ones who were like me; content to read, but feeling no need to post.

Of course, there’s always the possibility that it’s really just a few of us and I’m making it out to be more than it is. But I think I’m right. We are all looking. We all want it this bad. And I’m going to knock one of us off for my spot. More like ten, considering CD4’s acceptance rate..

Average SAT Scores

Note: This used to be a longer post, but I shortened it and stuff.

So, I’ve heard that NCSSM doesn’t release their average SAT Score. That’s bollocks.

NCSSM does cite SAT scores, just look at the school profile on their website.

Those don’t matter, though, because they compare your SAT score with your school’s average for seniors. So imagine my turn from glee to pissed-offness(annoyance, for those who prefer real words), when I turned from a decent SAT score generally to being an average scorer at my school.

But, hey, what can I do now besides write a good application?

A Taste

Warning: This is a post filled with musings. Not at all relevant. Maybe a little relevant. But completely nonsensical.

So, to be honest, I thought about posting, but whenever I wrote one, I got paranoid and thought I’d give away one of those “secrets” that I’ve discovered.
Truth is(What are you talking about, this isn’t Facebook): I haven’t really found many secrets.
But I did make a collegeconfidential account and post around there a little bit. It’s interesting to read all the stuff other people do. And by interesting, I mean slightly disheartening.

I sort of forgot about making this blog until there was a comment, but it’s really more of a journal, seeing my view total of 8 views. Some of those are probably me.

Since my last post, I’ve ACTUALLY started my application, instead of just staring at it with glee. All those questions are the same. It’s frustrating.
I amend that statement. They’re different, there’s just not enough to me to answer each one differently.

Now, on to the real point:
Since my last post, I also took the SAT and visited the school and played a ton of Assassin’s Creed III. I’ve calmed down a little bit, but only because I’m feeling confident for this half -second. Next half-second, I’ll be freaked out, nervous, and paranoid again.
There was some stuff that I loved about visiting. I loved how they talked about the school and I knew (almost) everything they told about. I loved the look of the campus – it’s a really beautiful campus, but I like buildings – and there are really beautiful people. Might just be my imagination taking over, but I’ll call them really beautiful people nonetheless.

What I didn’t like:(How could I say such a thing?!)

1. There were some frikken weird kids visiting. See, I’m weird, but in person I’m more or less presentable. By which I mean that online I sound like a complete nutcase, and that’s how my head works, but I hide it well. I seem normal. And if I don’t, whatever stupid thing I said was totally a joke.

2. I asked one of the students a question about the dorms and sounded REALLY weird and creepy. I sorta wanted to like punch myself in the face.

3. I looked at all the campus, talked to some students, learned about all the great things this school offers, and then… I’m not sure I’ll have it. They gave me a little bit of the school, and they might just keep it from me.
But they won’t, cause there’s nothing I can do but my best, which I’m already doing. Well, not my best, because I can’t manage time and I sorta have a lot of stuff I haven’t done yet and need to do, like learn to type so that this post doesn’t last the rest of my life.

Best of luck, my fellow applicants! And to those in CD4, worst of luck. Cause there’s only so much, and I need it all.
Joking. Even more luck to those in the Triangle and Charlotte area and all the other uber-competitive areas. I wish we could all get in.
No, I don’t. Then it wouldn’t be special. And I’d be surrounded by idiots, which I’d hate to be. And the cafeteria line would be so freaking long. But you understand the sentiment, right?